God Thinks Our Accusations are Comical - In the Nicest Way

The second day.

7:13 AM on the stove clock when I walked into the kitchen.

I slumped into a chair around the table, feeling guilty for being late again.

I closed my eyes and saw God in a suite and tie.

"You look like Patrick Dempsey." Or maybe Patrick Dempsey looks like God, whatever, it's still strangely amusing.

Once again in my mind's eye we were seated in some fancy restaurant. We chatted about weather-like topics until I cleared my throat to shift the subject.

"I feel left out and unloved, like a second class child." I traversed my way through descriptions of my hurts, ways I believed he had fallen short, but as I was running out of ammo, I lost sight of my target.

"I don't think it's fair that certain children of yours get special treatment."
If I microwave the green beans in this bowl that means I'll have to use another plastic container for my lunch. 
"It's as if there's some riddle to solve."
Ok, the rice is a little hard but it'll be unnoticeable once everything is put together.
"..."
Seriously Melissa, no more than a handful of cheese. You've gotta make it last.
"..."
Why does this look so small? Am I going to be hungry after lunch?
"..."
I guess I'll take carrot sticks again.
"Oops. What was I talking about?"
"That you felt ignored by me."

It was in the neighbourhood of 20 minutes before I realized I had left God without a chance to speak; the green beans had my sole concentration.

My exclamatory remarks were now a moot point. I didn't have the attention span to hear his explanation, at least not the same that I had reserved for the preparation of my lunch. If God slaps us in the face, he does it so gently.

Bowing my head in repentance, I felt my accusations were much like those who witnessed Jesus' death on the cross. But still, "Father forgive her. She doesn't know."

Whatever we have to throw at Jesus, he doesn't dodge it; he cradles it. He can hold the hot flames of allegations in his bare hands because they have no power over him. And he is patient to play catch with us, as if we were trying out for little league.